I've been so out of it lately. I can't seem to understand anything i'm doing. Everything i'm saying changes after a few sentences. Everything doesn't feel like me. Everything feels like someone else. I'm so annoyed because of that feeling. I feel like i can't do anything on my own any more. I'm always thinking about someone else's happiness or what my actions would do to theirs. It's making me go crazy. But i don't think it's exactly just these feelings. It's something else. I feel like i've lost myself. The person i use to be so fond of. The person i use to love. I lost it. I don't know where i left her behind. Well maybe i do,  i've melted within problems and insecurities. I'm tired of  admiring  those who got their shit together. I need to get myself back together. I need to start doing shit for myself. I need to clear my head. I might be a mess at the moment, but i think i found my muse. I can't stop wanting to read more on their thoughts. What they write makes me want to become a better person. What they write makes me feel better. What they write makes me feel like i haven't completely lost myself. I'm just well hidden at the moment. No one can really understand at the moment. I  mean, i don't think i want any one to understand. Because like i said before i have yet to understand what i'm going through. Maybe i'm growing up but i'm not to sure on that yet either. I really need time for myself. I'm telling you, i might just be going mad. One promise that i can make myself right now is that, i'm going to be taking baby steps.