I'm scared to let my guard down again. I can't define this if it's a good scared or a bad scared. But I am because of the distance and the lack of overly dose attention. What's wrong with me? Why do I like knowing everything?  It's annoying. I'm being annoying right now. Just let it go and breathe. Take baby steps. We made a month today and yikes, a month! A freaking month.You don't understand. I'm just not ready to let my guard down to something new.


Great, this all sounds like a conversation between myself.